Fountain of Youth
I was sitting on the number 7 crosstown bus when the older gentleman in front of me began to vibrate. I knew what that meant, but before I could get out of the way, sure enough, he exploded. Bits of flesh flew everywhere and the blood ruined the bag of feces I was carrying (a memento of my nephew's first communion). I looked across the aisle at a stylish twenty-something blonde who had chunks of organ meat all over her obviously expensive dress. "Old people!" she laughed, as she twisted her body to spray me with a stream of warm urine.
Out of the Mouths of Babes
Belle Moskowitz, a woman of a certain age, and her great-granddaughter Emma were playing one of their usual games, "Eat Grandma," when things went too far. "She had her mouth on my clit like a pitbull clamped onto a drug dealer's balls," reports Belle. "I was bleeding like a virgin on a date with Ted Bundy. I finally realized I'd have to hack her head off with Moishe's meat cleaver to make her let go. Just as I was about to bring the blade crashing down, Moishe screamed, "Stop, that's a fish knife!"
Family Affair
As per usual on a Sunday evening, I was fellating my father-in-law. Just as I was running my tongue in little circles on the underside of the head and had him squirming and ready to pop, my wife walked in. "Oh, you men with your sports," she clucked, ducking to miss an arcing stream of cum.
